"Wait on the LORD: be of good courage." (Psalm 27:14, KJV)
You're not married the way you were. You're not divorced yet either. Nobody gave you a map for the in-between.
Maybe you're waiting on a court date that keeps getting pushed back. A custody evaluation. A signature from your ex. An offer on the house. Life feels paused, yet the bills and bedtime routines keep moving.
If you've whispered "How long, Lord?" into your pillow more than once, this post is for you. Waiting is hard. But it isn't wasted.
Key Takeaways
- The "in-between" of separation and pending divorce is a real season, and it's one of the hardest kinds of waiting.
- Biblical waiting is active, not passive. It means hoping, praying and doing today's small faithful things.
- Honest lament is allowed. Psalm 13 starts with "How long?" and still ends in trust.
- Sorting what you can't control from what you can do today brings peace back into your days.
- Three simple practices help: daily small faithfulness, a prayer journal and real community.
Why the In-Between Feels So Heavy
Limbo is exhausting because you can't fully grieve and you can't fully plan. You're holding your breath, waiting for someone else to decide what happens next.
That loss of control can make your faith feel shaky, like God has forgotten you.
Here's the gentle truth: waiting seasons run all through Scripture, and they're often where God does His quietest work. If you're still in the first raw days, start with Just Separated? Your First 7 Days, then come back here for the long middle.
What the Bible Actually Says About Waiting
Waiting on God in the Bible isn't sitting on your hands. It's hoping and leaning your weight on Someone faithful. Three verses worth taping to your mirror:
- Isaiah 40:31 (KJV): "But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."
- Psalm 27:14 (KJV): "Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD."
- Lamentations 3:25-26 (KJV): "The LORD is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him. It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD."
Notice what's promised. Not a faster court date. Strength. Courage. A heart that's held up while the answer is still coming.
Lamentations was written amid devastation. The writer chose hope while the rubble was still smoking.
Three People Who Waited Well (and Honestly)
Hannah: peace before the answer
Hannah longed for a child, and year after year her rival provoked her until she wept and wouldn't eat (1 Samuel 1:6-7). At the temple she prayed so intensely that the priest Eli thought she was drunk. She told him she had "poured out my soul before the LORD."
Then something beautiful happens. After she prayed, "her countenance was no more sad" (1 Samuel 1:18). She hadn't conceived yet. But she had handed it over, and peace came before the answer.
Joseph: faithful in the waiting room
Joseph was sold by his brothers at 17 and didn't stand before Pharaoh until he was 30 (Genesis 37:2; 41:46). Along the way he was falsely accused and thrown in prison. Even there, "the LORD was with Joseph" (Genesis 39:21), and he was put in charge of the other prisoners.
Then the cupbearer he helped forgot him for two full years (Genesis 41:1). If you've ever felt forgotten by a system, Joseph gets it. He kept showing up anyway.
Ruth: "Sit still, my daughter"
Ruth was a widow in a foreign land. She went to work gleaning in the fields to feed herself and her mother-in-law, Naomi, through the barley and wheat harvests. When everything hung on a decision being made at the city gate, Naomi told her, "Sit still, my daughter, until thou know how the matter will fall" (Ruth 3:18, KJV).
That's limbo in one sentence: do your part, then wait on a decision that isn't yours.
Free: The Emergency Budget Reset
Waiting on a settlement or a house sale? These 5 money moves help you steady the next 30 days while the big decisions are still pending.
Get the Free Guide →You're Allowed to Say "How Long?"
Psalm 13 opens with this: "How long wilt thou forget me, O LORD? for ever? how long wilt thou hide thy face from me?"
That's in your Bible, on purpose.
The same psalm ends, "But I have trusted in thy mercy; my heart shall rejoice in thy salvation" (Psalm 13:5). Lament and trust live in the same prayer. You don't have to pick one. If you're angry, not just tired, Praying When You're Furious at God may help you put words to it.
| Passive waiting | Active waiting |
|---|---|
| Refreshing the attorney portal 12 times a day | Checking at a set time, then setting it down |
| "I'll start living once this is over." | "I can make today good, even unfinished." |
| Hiding the hard feelings from God | Bringing the "how long?" straight to Him |
| Replaying worst-case scenarios at 2 a.m. | Writing the fear down and praying over it |
What I Can't Control vs. What I Can Do Today
When everything feels stuck, draw a line down a page. One side: what's in someone else's hands. The other: what's yours.
| What I can't control | What I can do today |
|---|---|
| When the court date lands | Keep my documents organized and my calendar clear for it |
| What the custody decision will be | Be a steady, present mom at dinner tonight |
| Whether my ex responds kindly | Reply calmly, briefly and in writing |
| When the house sells, or for how much | Track this week's spending and set aside what I can |
| How long this season lasts | Pray, rest and take one walk outside |
Lamentations calls this "quietly" waiting. Quiet isn't checked out. It's settled enough to do the next right thing.
Three Practices for the Long Middle
1. Daily small faithfulness
Joseph didn't wait for prison to end before he did good work. Pick two or three small anchors for each day. Make the bed. Read one psalm. Pack the lunches with a note inside. They're tiny acts of trust.
If your morning needs words, borrow the ones in The Prayer I Prayed Every Morning During My Divorce.
2. A prayer journal
Waiting makes days blur together. A simple notebook gives you a record. Try three lines a day:
- What I'm waiting on: name it plainly.
- What I'm feeling: be as honest as Psalm 13.
- Where I saw God today: even something small, like a kind text or a quiet hour.
Months from now, you'll flip back and see answers you forgot you prayed for.
3. Community that waits with you
Ruth didn't wait alone. She had Naomi, and Naomi had her. You need one or two people who will sit in the not-knowing with you without trying to fix it.
You're also in good company. Pew Research Center's 2023-24 Religious Landscape Study found that 44% of U.S. adults pray at least once a day. You are far from the only woman bringing her waiting to God tonight.
of U.S. adults say they pray at least once a day. Another 23% pray weekly or a few times a month.
If your circle got smaller in the separation, Rebuilding Your Support System walks you through where to start.
When the Waiting Ends
Someday the paperwork will be signed and the house will close. You'll find that the woman who walks out of this season isn't the same one who walked in.
Hard seasons can clear ground for new growth. Read You Are Not a Burned Field.
Until then, wait with courage. Lament when you need to. Do today's small faithful thing. Always forward, never backward.
Life Refined Signature Reset™
The waiting season is a good time to quietly rebuild who you are, even before the decree is final. Life Refined Signature Reset™ helps you reconnect with your values and shape a life that fits, so you're ready to step into whatever comes next.
Explore Life Refined Signature Reset™ →Frequently Asked Questions
What does it mean to wait on God during a divorce?
It means trusting God with the outcomes you can't control, like court dates or custody decisions, while staying faithful in the things you can do today. Biblical waiting is hopeful and active.
What Bible verse is good for waiting on God?
Isaiah 40:31, Psalm 27:14 and Lamentations 3:25-26 are three of the most loved. Psalm 13 is especially helpful when you need permission to be honest about how long the waiting feels.
Is it wrong to be frustrated with God while I wait?
No. The psalms are full of honest complaint, including "How long wilt thou forget me, O LORD?" in Psalm 13. Bringing your frustration to God is a form of faith, not a failure of it.
How do I cope with the limbo of separation before divorce is final?
Separate what you can't control from what you can do today, build a few small daily anchors, keep a prayer journal and stay connected to one or two safe people.
This article is for educational and encouragement purposes only and is not legal, financial, medical or mental health advice, nor a substitute for pastoral counseling. For guidance on your specific situation, consult a qualified professional. If you are in crisis, call or text 988. If you are in danger, call 911 or the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.